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Telling a Bullshits

Manusia itu makhluk emosi. Ia yang mengemudikan perilaku dan keputusan, termasuk sebuah kebohongan. Ketika merasa cemas, khawatir ia akan bermanuver, menghindari rintangan yang kadangkala hanya fatamorgana. Ketakutannya yang menjadikannya kemudian memutar lidah, mengatakan omong kosong. 
Apakah setelah beermanuver musti meminta maaf? Hal inilah yang sedang kupertimbangkan. Setelah mengatakan sebuah kebohongan, rasa bersalah itu akan muncul. Kemudian, ada keinginan untuk meminta maaf. Namun sesunggguhnya kepada siapakah permintaan maaf ii sebenarnya diajukan? Apakah kepada orang yang telah dibohongi? atau kepada diri kita sendiri yang telah dihianati. Sebab saat berbohong, diri sendirilah yang kemudian bersedih.
Di sisi lain, ego terkadang membuat pembenaran. Alasan-alasan yang memungkinkan norma menerima alasan kita untuk berbohong. Sayangnya, meskipun alasan telah dibuat sedemikian rupa, rasa bersalah masih menang. Apa buktinya? Keinginan untuk meminta maaf itu selalu muncul pertama. 
Lalu, apa yang mustinya diharapkan setelah meminta maaf? Penerimaan? Kasihan? Kesan baik? 
Tidakkah kemudian permintaan maaf kehilangan esensinya? 
Jika difikirkan lebih lagi, memaafkan itu sebenarnya apa? 

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